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Consulting Eric: My husband prohibits me from traveling with friends


In a recent letter to advice columnist R. Eric Thomas, a woman expressed her frustration with her husband who believes husbands and wives should not travel separately to avoid potential issues such as infidelity. The woman, who is a travel agent, used to enjoy solo travel before getting married but has given it up to appease her husband’s concerns. However, her husband’s insecurity has escalated to the point where he suggested separating due to their differing views on travel.

Thomas advises the woman that her husband’s baggage around infidelity is now becoming a problem in their marriage, and he is not truly compromising by restricting her solo travel. He suggests that the husband’s unwillingness to consider counseling shows a lack of commitment to the marriage’s success. Thomas emphasizes that marriage is a partnership and requires both parties to work towards a common goal.

The woman is encouraged to stand up for her own interests and not sacrifice her career or personal enjoyment for her husband’s insecurities. If her husband continues to refuse counseling and insist on controlling her travel decisions, she may need to reevaluate the relationship and decide if his demands are worth sacrificing their marriage for.

Ultimately, Thomas stresses that a healthy marriage requires mutual respect, compromise, and a willingness to address issues together. If the husband is unwilling to do so, the woman may need to consider whether the relationship is meeting her needs and fulfilling her desires for independence and personal fulfillment.

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