Miss Manners: Was it appropriate for me to attend the funeral?

A woman from a former “moms of preschoolers” group is unsure about attending a former member’s funeral due to a comment made by the deceased’s husband. The woman was not aware of the woman’s illness and felt awkward after receiving a lecture about lack of support during the illness. Miss Manners advises that attending the funeral would not have been ghoulish, as ghouls enjoy graveyards, and suggests it may have been better to go to show support despite the husband’s comments. However, if there were concerns about potential scenes from the husband, it was reasonable not to attend. The husband’s comments are seen as emotional outbursts during grief and are best overlooked. Miss Manners suggests sending a condolence letter as a thoughtful gesture. Overall, the advice is to act with compassion and empathy in such situations, focusing on showing support and kindness rather than getting caught up in any potential negativity. Despite the awkwardness, it is important to remember the positive memories and relationships shared with the deceased individual.

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